Girl Talk
- The Franklin Factor: Early to bed and early to rise means it's time to meet more guys.
- The Rat Race: If there's one rat in a room full of nice men, he'll hit on you first.
- The Eyeglass Prescription: Don't wear your glasses on a blind date. You'll look better, and he will too.
- The Ring Rule: A watched telephone never rings.
- The Creep Call: Never pick up the phone on Saturday night. It's a call from a creep you told you were busy.
- The Fishing Forecast: They say there are lots of good fish in the sea. But who wants to go out with a fish?
- The Psychological Prognosis: Love is a form of temporary insanity curable by marriage.
- The Rope Trick: Give a man enough rope and he'll lasso another woman.
- Mind Over Matter: No one ever falls in love with another person's mind at a cocktail party.
- The Fault Finder: The faster way to discover all your bad habits is to move in with your lover.
- The Unintended Result: 1) Men's desire for sex sometimes results in intimacy; 1a) Men often go looking for sex and end up finding love; 2) Women's desire for intimacy often results in sex; 2a) Women often go looking for love and end up finding only sex.
- The Rabbit Rule: Only newlyweds and liars make love every day.
- The Dangle Doctrine: You can't keep a good man down.
- Twain's Truth: Familarity breeds children.
- The Fertility Factor: Women are only fertile a few days each month, unless they're single.
- The Preparation Predicament: The longer you spend in the bathroom preparing for sex, the more likely he's fallen asleep by the time you're ready.