What is a TURDUCKEN ?

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• A repository of ageless wisdom.
• A large mammal that "tastes like chicken."
• The native adult beverage of Turkey.
• An obscure statistical variant of the chi-square test.
• The remote control to a parking meter.
• The treatment for an astigmatism.
• The red nose hair on a clown.
• A man's hairstyle that covers a bald spot.
• The reason Bob Dole lost the election.
• A riding lawnmower with a three-inch deck.
• An intact flying saucer that has been buried seven miles under the north polar ice cap for 17,233 years.
• A four-dimensional sphere.
• A microscopic fissure in the space-time continuum caused by quantum fluctuations in the gravitational field generated by a four-dimensional sphere no more massive than a positron but no less massive than a boson.
• The ache in your head caused by trying to unscramble the Star Trek-esque techno-jargon in #13.
• The ache in my Trekker heart caused by mocking the show.
• A leaf on a rare animal-eating plant: the Venus dung-beetle trap.
• Your third wisdom tooth.
• An icecicle that points up.
• The name for a tandem bicycle in Sweden (spelled "Turducken").
• A good name for a rock band.
• A bathyscaphe submarine capable of reaching a depth of eight miles -- under liquid nitrogen.
• A person with one eyebrow.
• The number "six" in Swahili.
• A 2-karat gold-plated half-eaten tangerine.
• The technical name for the "apple" key on a Mac.
• A pink elephant as seen through a jumble of funhouse mirrors, one side of a pair of binoculars, and an LSD high.
• A spent uranium mine which has been converted into a theme park for children.
• A color that is a mix of rusty maroon, navy blue, and neon green.
• Another way to spell "trinitrotoluene."
• The standard greeting of SAGA Steve's cloned replacement in 2274 in Mongolia.
• An economic theory which states that higher taxes results in more prosperity. Also known as "liberalism."
• The ravenous love chortles of the Madagascar Rabbit-Bunny.
• An Activities Board event which involves the Dating Game and Virtual Reality....
• The 312-move checkmate.
• The deja vu sensation of Chinese water torture while being nibbled to death by ducks.
• The official name for the plastic wrappers around peppermint candies.
• A 750-watt halogen night light.
• An abstract painting of the letter W in a bar fight with the color blue, in which the bartender is a moldy grilled-cheese sandwich serving polka music as a beverage.
• A Freudian slip knot.
• That "bong" sound when you have a new e-mail message.
• A Martian base on the Moon which will be the staging area for their invasion in 1999.
• The number after "eleventeen".
• The elected leader of all dwarvenkind.
• A pastry made of eggs, flour, vinegar, tofu, iron shavings, and cups and cups of baking soda.
• The aspect of the Force which controls levitation and body-odor suppression.
• A bathing suit that dissolves in water.
• An idiot who has nothing better to do than come up with 47 possible definitions for "turducken."
• A pagan god worshiped as part of a cross-stitching and needlepoint ritual.
• A collection of toenail clippings from famous persons.
• The preferred name in the 19th century in Europe for the internal combustion engine.

(It actually turned out to be a Southern US dish combining turkey, duck and chicken. Kind of disappointing really.)