Astrological Prayers
- ARIES
- Dear God, please give me patience... and could you do it right now?
- TAURUS
- Dear God, help me accept change, but not too quick.
- GEMINI
- Dear God! Who is God? Where is God? Why is God?
- CANCER
- Dear God!!!
- LEO
- Yes?
- VIRGO
- Dear God, please make us perfect and don't mess it up like You did the last time.
- LIBRA
- Dear God, please help me to be decisive, but on the other hand, what do you think is best?
- SCORPIO
- Our Father, forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors, even though the b*****ds don't deserve it!
- SAGITTARIUS
- Dear Lord, if I've told you once, I've told you a million times, help me stop exaggerating.
- CAPRICORN
- Dear God! I'd like to ask you to help me, but I learned a long time ago not to rely on anyone else!
- AQUARIUS
- Dear God, I know I like change, but this chaos is ridiculous!!
- PISCES
- Dear Lord, as long as I'm going to drink this fifth of Scotch tonight, please use the stimulation for Thy glory.