UNIX problems
Customer:What is the command that will tell me the revision code of a program ?
UNIX console:Yes, that's correct.
Customer:No, what is it ?
UNIX console:Yes.
Customer:So, which is the one ?
UNIX console:No. 'which' is used to find the program.
Customer:Stop this. Who are you ?
UNIX console:Use 'who am i' not 'who r you'. You can also 'finger you' to get information about you'.
Customer:All I want to know is what finds the revision code ?
UNIX console:Use 'what'.
Customer:That's what I am trying to find out. Isn't that true ?
UNIX console:No. 'true' gives you 0.
Customer:Which one ?
UNIX console:'true' gives you 0. 'which programname'
Customer:Let's get back to my problem. What program? How do I find it?
UNIX console:Type 'find / -name it -print' to find 'it'. Type 'what program' to get the revision code.
Customer:I want to find the revision code.
UNIX console:You can't 'find revisioncode', you must use 'what program'.
Customer:Which command will do what I need?
UNIX console:No. 'which command' will find 'command'.
Customer:I think I understand. Let me write that.
UNIX console:You can 'write that' only if 'that' is a user on your system.
Customer:Write what?
UNIX console:No. 'write that'. 'what program'.
Customer:Cut that out!
UNIX console:Yes. those are valid files for 'cut'. Don't forget the options.
Customer:Do you always do this ?
UNIX console:'du' will give you disk usage.
UNIX console:'help' is only used for Source Code Control System (SCCS).
Customer:You make me angry.
UNIX console:No, I don't 'make me' angry but I did 'make programname' when I was upset once.
Customer:I don't want to make trouble, so no more.
UNIX console:No 'more'? 'which' will help you find 'more'. Every system has 'more'.
Customer:Nice help! I'm confused more now!
UNIX console:Understand that since 'help' is such a small program, it is better not to 'nice help'. and 'more now' is not allowed but 'at now' is. Unless of course 'now' is a file name.
Customer:This is almost as confusing as my PC.
UNIX console:I didn't know you needed help with 'pc'. Let me get you to the Pascal compiler team.